When Clear Vision Becomes Muddy

A full-relapse is a tricky occurance. It starts as a “one time” thing, an “I deserve this” decision. It’s nice. It’s fun. The only problem is that after I say “yes”, it’s much more easy, encouraged, and acceptable for me to say “yes” again. The mindset of “I ejoyed myself, this could be a normal thing for me again. I’ll be able to manage myself and my time better, and everything will be fine”. Befre you know it, you’re standing in an entirely different place (mentally). Walking in was done slowly and carefully, barefoot on soft carpet. Walking in was uncomfortable at first, but ultimately it was easily done. Walking out is like wading, stomach deep, through mud. Some actions, much like people and places, are only meant to be experienced on a surface level, not submersed in.

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